In the shoes of others

I'm not very good at talking about my feelings

- I'm not very good at talking about my feelings and communicating. At certain times I can be quite good, but I can also be quite bad. Which I guess isn't difficult to understand, but it's difficult to... no deal with, but to work out. Apart from that I'm quite simple, there's nothing that's major like people won't understand me. What I see is usually what I mean, so...

- Okay, so, how does that affect your friendships for instance?

- Well, if there's something wrong, the chances of me saying it are low. So I tend to bottle things up and then it will come out and it will create more of an issue than it is. I mean, that is really rare for me to do that anyway, I don't really cause any problems anyway, (laughing) but, if there's ever a point, I will start bottling up and be like, not getting angry, but a wee bit eggy than I would need to if I had to say what was wrong before. But that's rare, because I don't really argue very often. I've noticed myself doing it a few times, and I've noticed myself like « Ahh, if I had maybe said that in a kinder way, then this wouldn't have happened... » or « If I had not bottled up, I wouldn't be so annoyed » even if it's small things.

- So if someone upsets you for whatever reason and you don't say anything, you go home, behind the scenes, what is it that we don't see, that this person won't see, how do you cope or deal with your feelings?

- Usually I don't like to be alone, and as I don't wanna talk about it, I'll just go for a run or a walk up the hill or something. (laughing) I did that the other day just because I wanted to like... it's quite strange, but to be surrounded by people, strangers or whatever, so you're not alone, but also I don't need to talk to them. Because sometimes I am better at dealing with myself, getting over it and I'll be fine, rather than... sometimes I don't really like everyone's opinions so it's like « Let me deal with it and then I will be fine ». I usually get over it in like a day or something, depending on what it is.
If I'm angry, I will never get angry, I will just like cry or something... if I'm feeling frustration, then I will just talk to one person who I feel will listen. I'll just talk to them, get it all out, and then I'll go home to be alone for a bit and then I'll come back and I'll be fine. I usually do that and... I mean it's not usually because it's never really that usual, but, if I was ever annoyed, then that's what I would do.

- Are you good at crying?

- Hummmm yeah, I think so, but I don't cry often. I don't really like to cry often, if I'm crying, it's usually out of frustration, and that's how it comes out. But I don't really cry often... I don't like to cry...

- That's not especially a way to cope with things for you?

- If it is, then it's maybe more serious if I'm crying. If I care more about it I'll cry. If I don't care that much, if I know I'm just being maybe grumpy or tired, then I'll just get over it...

- Anything else to add around that?

- I don't think so... I've made myself sound quite complicated but I promise I'm not. (laughing) I'm quite simple!

#talking #feelings #communicating #communication #quitegood #quitebad #difficulttounderstand #understand #bottlingup #bottleup #angry #eggy #argue #annoyed #behindthescenes #alone #dealwiththings #opinions #crying #complicated #quitesimple

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